Well the correct answer to that is anyfuckingthing they want to. however, it’s the qualifier there that tells the story. No real man would ever want to eat Hummus. They don’t eat Foie Gras either, however they would eat the duck. And real men still don’t eat quiche, although eggs and sausage or bacon are the staple of a real man breakfast.
Real men eat steak but only one of two ways, rare or well done, real men are decisive and don’t want something done half assed.
Chicken it all it’s myraid ways of being cooked is real man food, Cottage cheese is not.
Pork Chops, Loin, Ham or Roast are real man foods, Yogurt is not.
Sushi and Sashimi are real man foods, as are other exotic dishes like alligator, rattle snake, rabbit, and fried shrimp heads. Also included are Bison, Antelope, Deer, Elk, and fresh caught fish.
Salad, Tofu, Lean Cuisine, Special K and pasta salads are not real man food.
Real men eat potatoes, rice, and most cooked vegetables, primarily as filler though. If you add brown sugar, sauces, glazes, varnish or puree them they are no longer edible to a real man. If you add tabasco, or streak-o-lean, salt, pepper or garlic they are even better.
An example of a real man dinner:
Appetizer: fried onion or potatoes with bacon, onions, sour cream and a hot pepper
Entree: 22 oz porterhouse, rare. Baked Potato, loaded. Green beans well done.
Dessert: A shot of Crown Royal and a Monte Cristo #4
Oh ya they eat pussy too….
3 Responses
Here’s a quote from Hunter when we go to a steakhouse ….. “Just run the herd through and I’ll cut off what I want”. And he eats it…..all bloody and barely warm….yuck! I like it a little pink, but not gooey with blood. Hmmm…kinda like I like pussy. But seriously, in my opinion, REAL men eat what-the-fuck-ever REAL women cook for them, no matter what it is. In this extreme, Hunter is a REAL man. Now, I’m a fantastic cook, but sometimes I’ll try a recipe that hasn’t been tested on humans………and he eats it, or at least tries it. Ever wonder who ate the first oyster? Hunter probably did.
I have wondered many times who ate the first raw oyster….the man had balls the size of grapefruits. That or he was one hungry mofo.
Contrary to popular belief, I am NOT old enough to have eaten the first oyster. But if nobody’s got dibs, I will take that last one.