Trinity St. Clair and The Great Cheese Heist (READER EMAIL)

I don’t want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap. ~ Latin proverb


Sometimes when a reader submits a tip you have to make sure you’re not dreaming, or that they’re not just telling you what you want to hear, because their story is almost too good to be true. Such is the case with porn star and wanted fugitive Trinity “Sticky Fingers” St. Clair‘s Woodland Hills cheese heist.

The source of this reader email, however, does check out, right down to intimate details we have omitted for reasons of privacy. They’re not in it for fame, since they don’t want their name used. And, importantly, the allegations have the ring of truth.

[S]o I just discovered your site and I had to write to tell you about an experience I had with [ ] Trinity St. Clair.

She used to shop at the Ralphs market where I work in Woodland Hills. I say “used to” because she got herself 86’d from the store after being caught trying to steal some cheese.

She looks unassuming in person, and she tried to play it off and do the whole poor innocent girl thing, so they took back the goods and banned her from ever coming back onto the premises. So, “The Great Cheese Heist” was a bust. And if you ask me she got off easy. People like this have usually stolen before, and will again. Losses they create end up hurting employees and customers by lowering revenues and increasing prices.

I read your previous story about her thievery, and I have to say you nailed it. She’s a cool customer who will lie or turn on the waterworks to get away with what she does.

The Ralphs supermarket in Woodland Hills, Calif., located a half-mile from Trinity’s reputed “trap house“.


“Eeny, meeny, miny, mo” whispers Trinity St. Clair


A pattern of criminality

One of the things that struck our reader informant is that the mousey St. Clair has a history of theft.

Last year, I reported on St. Clair’s October 2013 shoplifting arrest in New Castle, Delaware, days after the 2013 Exxxotica Expo in Edison, New Jersey.

New Castle is 96 miles from Edison and lies just south of Wilmington, Delaware; a little more than half-way between Edison and Baltimore, Maryland.

From California to Delaware: Trinity St. Clair's Criminal Record and its Significance - Trinity St. Clair and The Great Cheese Heist
Trinity’s mug shot from her October 2013 shoplifting arrest.


St. Clair was released on her own recognizance (O.R.) and ordered to appear in court at a later time. However, she did not to appear and a “Capias” Failure to Appear (FTA) warrant (known elsewhere as a bench warrant) was issued in Justice of the Peace Court 11 in New Castle.St. Clair had fled the jurisdiction, never to return.

One month after we ran the story of her flight from justice, Trinity decided to tell “her side” of the saga on Twitter.

It was a tale of victimhood: she claimed that the only reason she was arrested was that she needed a jacket because her boyfriend kicked her out and the temperature was below 11 degrees (fahrenheit). Unfortunately for Trinity, historical weather data proved that in New Castle on the day Trinity was arrested it was a sunny afternoon with a high of 83 degrees. In fact, it was one of the warmest days of the month for that town.

How long do you reckon it will be until Trinity takes to Twitter to explain away her cheese heist?

“My boyfriend kicked me out and all I had was a box of Ritz Crackers!”

245180cookie-checkTrinity St. Clair and The Great Cheese Heist (READER EMAIL)

Trinity St. Clair and The Great Cheese Heist (READER EMAIL)

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16 Responses

  1. I know this story isn’t verified but if it is true (and I tend to believe it) Ms. St. Whore must be a kleptomaniac. What does she really gain from only stealing $5 worth of cheese? If you are going to shoplift and risk LA County Jail time at least do it for something making the risk theoretically worthwhile. What did she try to steal Wally World in Delaware — a pack of chewing gum, a pack of mints and a candy bar? Not only is Ms. St. Whore a bitch she must be an idiot as well.

  2. Her sense of entitlement lets her steal because she figured she can and would not be punished. Sociopaths think like that. Just like Cosby kept on drugging and raping girls because he got away with it so many times he figured he was above the law.

    He’s America’s Dad for fucks sake (in his mind).

  3. A friend has suggested that perhaps they were having a wine and cheese party at the trap house LOL.

  4. A wine and cheese party, huh? What did she do after trying to steal the $5 block of cheese — go to a liquor store and shoplift two bottles of Mad Dog 20/20? That would be her taste, she doesn’t have enough class to drink real wine. After that did she knock down a drug dealer with a baseball bat and steal enough cocaine to last Ms. St. Whore and her prisoner chickies for 20 minutes? Ms. St. Whore is an idiot as well as a pimpette and a whore!

    More seriously, I like your friend’s sense of humor with this one, Voice. However, Ms. St. Whore won’t like LA County Jail when she is caught. Shasta County Jail is a kindergarten compared to LA County. The gangbanger chicks at LA County know just how to punish a wimpy ass pussy like Ms. St. Whore — and it involves making her their bitch and making her wash their bras/underwear in the sink, eat out their pussies and give them all of her commissary snacks, deodorant, soap, etc. This is all during times where the five bubba guard club doesn’t have her handcuffed from behind, on her back or stomach and taking multiple bubba guard dick in her holes at the same time. I hope they don’t nut in her pussy, however. Ms. St. Whore would make a terrible parent and if she gave birth after her sentence was done she wouldn’t stay away from the drink and drugs — causing a deformed, retarded baby from her lack of the ability to put someone above herself. Sometimes I wonder if Ms. St. Whore isn’t retarded herself — or that she has done so many drugs that 90% of her brain cells are fried. I would tell Ms. St. Whore to suck my dick but she probably has a scorching case of herpes in her throat from those condomless $35 blow and gos in the back seat of her Bentley at Porn Star Karaoke (I also wonder if she has crashed that Bentley driving while drunk off of her ass yet).

  5. This is really funny. Who would steal cheese and from Ralphs? Thanks for the laughs, Mike.

  6. The Neighborhood watch commander must be marching up and down the street listening to all the railings going on in that trap house. Girls locked in their rooms. Maybe counting cars stopping by at all odd hours of the night. Real quick drive through car dates. Legs wide open for business. Blue light specials speak easy codes

  7. Funny, Skeet. However, that is sort of an insult to the actual “Mrs Chiquita Banana lady”. Bananas actually taste good, Ms. St. Whore’s pussy probably tastes like rotten fish from a bad case of BV. 🙂

  8. Whenever I have a crap day I just look at these photos for a laugh. Thanks, Mike!

  9. If you can get pictures of Ms. St. Whore “ralphing” (throwing up) in the cheese or Mad Dog 20/20 sections of the Chatsworth Ralph’s please post pictures. 🙂

    More seriously, I hope Ms. St. Whore gets her time in handcuffs and LA Women’s Central Jail being booked for this, the $5 worth of cheese isn’t my big gripe but considering she has false imprisonment, fraud, pimping (by coercion), shoplifting in Delaware that she will likely never face consequences for, possibly slipping Amber Rayne a hot dose of extra-strength cocaine (we will never know now as her body almost certainly decomposed before anyone knew of Ms. St. Whore’s involvement and the LA City Police of her past — technically Amber died in the Los Angeles city limits) and probably 20 other crimes that we don’t know about. I bet Ms. St. Whore wants me cuffed and stuffed after my comments here at Mike South but at least I don’t have a strong aversion to moderate bondage (or maybe send me into an erection and ejaculation if the cop doing it is a cute chick) unlike 90% of society. What to me would probably be mildly uncomfortable might send Ms. St. Whore into a wriggling, wailing, screaming frenzy. The stuffing (which happens after a suspect gets to the jail) would be much more uncomfortable and painful for me.

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