From time to time I do the public speaking thing and I got a short notice gig for this week. I’m going to be speaking to a class at a local University about relationships within the adult industry.
In prepping for this it has occurred to me how very few actually survive. I can think of Tim Case and Felicia Fox, Steve and Serenity, Voodoo and Nicole Sheridan and Lexi L”Amour and Ethan Cage. That’s about it.
Of those only Voodoo and Nicole (to my knowledge) weren’t together before entering the biz.
So it’s going to seem obvious to the people in this class that there is something about the biz that is detrimental to relationships and of course they will see it as the sex.
But is it more than that?
I suspect it is. I have come to the realization that this biz attracts people who are narcissistic to begin with.
One of the things I always tell new girls in this biz is that nobody in this biz is your friend. Everyone in it wants something from you. That was advice passed along to me by Dirty Bob many years ago and to this day I remember it. I also don’t always live by it and everytime I don’t it bites me in the ass.
It was once said to me about a porn chick that the reason she likes twitter so much is because the depth of her soul is right at 140 characters. It’s funny but it also true.
I think to have a successful relationship in this biz you have to have a very very special set of circumstances and you have to be extraordinarily well adjusted. It goes without saying you have to have guilt and jealousy in check but I think you have to be really good at communication, which is the core of any relationship. This should be a fun one, Im sure the students will learn something, and so will I.