Which brings me to the modern burden of adult men: Wives who don’t enjoy sex.

There’s a new Head of the Georgia State Department of Transportation. First thing out of the box: they don’t know how many projects they are doing, by number.

They don’t know how many lawsuits they have against them, by number.

And it has gotten worse.

This is the preeminent issue regarding quality of life in this region. They could fuck up less important things, but NO! they fumbled this one.

Note: don’t be a woman or a kid in need of state care or protection. These people can’t build a left hand turn lane for Chrissakes.

So Wifeys: there’s a task, a set of behaviors that husband sort of, you know, expect. Fun sex is one of them. Enjoyed, pursued, agreed that it is important.

There was a party the other night. Lotsa wifeys. And actually heard from one that sex was something on her list of things to do, that it had been gotten out of the way.  Checked off her list when the husband came around with his “boy attitude”.

Had a sad recently single gal (I wonder what she tastes like?) ask me (wrong guy to ask) why men she meets or dates expect sex so soon? What was wrong with companionship? Maybe it’s the fact that you are not-to-torn-up, blonde, and might weigh 110? And what was wrong with the women she knows that give it up so soon, even the evening of the first date. Answer: NOTHING! And why do men want it so damn bad?

Aye carumba…

Squelching the urge to speak HONESTLY was tough, but you don’t make the Pro Bowl sitting on the bench. There’s no right answer for questions so wrong, only feigned interest and pretend compassion. I can throw DOWN some fake compassion; years of sunday school didn’t go to waste.

So there wasn’t any honesty that night, no forced issues since then. No fun sex, which is expected, just drowned sorrows with my gorilla brethren at the local pond. Told you guys face-to-face sex positions was the end of it. Told ya’!

Point?  Isn’t it uncanny how the most important thing is the one that disappoints the most? The one we can’t afford to fumble is the biggest mistake, right out of the box.

But there’s this COOL new outlet for suburban stress and mid life depression avoidance. Thanks Mike, and thank you gentle readers.


20450cookie-checkModern Burden

Modern Burden

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