Imagine Michael Avenatti with Tourette’s: Profane Lawyer Could Face Profound Problems
Christopher Hook, a plaintiffs’ lawyer in Los Angeles, is representing a client in an insurance dispute over about $200,000. However, his insulting and vulgar language in emails to opposing counsel, including bon mots such as “eat a bowl of dicks,” “let the long dick of the law f*ck [your client],” “cumstain,” and “limp dick mother f*cker”, has led to a host of problems for foul-mouthed sheister.
Some examples of Cook’s coarse language, from a court filing:
As Kathryn Rubino notes at Above The Law:
You had to know that no judge was was going to be happy that a litigant appearing in their court was getting internet-famous for the insults he hurled at opposing counsel.
A show-cause hearing began badly and then got worse for Hook, the ABAJournal reports. The profane attorney had been ordered to show cause why he shouldn’t be sanctioned for his string of insulting and expletive-laden missives.
But Hook appeared to be missing when the hearing started at 1:30 p.m. Monday before U.S. District Judge Otis Wright, report the Recorder and Law360.
The hearing began without him. Hook’s now-former clients told Wright that they had no idea that Hook was sending emails that labeled Allstate’s lawyers from Sheppard, Mullin, Richter & Hampton as “gay boys,” “shit for brains,” “fuckface” and “fucktard.”
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After hearing from Hook’s former clients—who are now represented by Barnes & Thornburg—Wright agreed that he wouldn’t dismiss their case against Allstate. At that point, Hook stood up from the courtroom audience.
Wright appeared angry, according to Law360. “Were you hiding?” Wright asked. “Were you waiting to make a fashionable entrance?”
Hook said he had arrived before the hearing began and apologized. But civil minutes filed in the case said Hook did not arrive to court until 1:37 p.m. “The court speaks with Mr. Hook about his lateness to the hearing and his unprofessional behavior as stated on the record,” the minutes said.
However, the official minutes omit the hearing’s verbal fireworks, as reported by Law360 and the Recorder.
Law360 reported that Wright slammed his hands on the bench and said he had never seen such behavior. According to the Recorder, Wright pounded his fist and demanded to know when Hook had apologized in writing to the court, as he asserted in court papers.
Hook continued to maintain that the emails could not be authenticated, prompting a warning from Wright, according to the Recorder. “This is not the day to be cute,” he said. “And I am not the guy.”
Hook said the emails were designed to get Allstate to discuss a settlement, but he became angry when Allstate lawyers wouldn’t return his phone calls.
Hook said he failed to conduct himself in a professional manner, and it was a mistake. But he also said the emails were protected by the First Amendment and the litigation privilege.
“You honestly believe the First Amendment extends to anything?” Wright replied. “You did go to law school, right?”
Wright told Hook that he had threatened people, and he had been acting like a gangster, the articles reported.
Wright said to Hook the legal profession does not need him. “I am going to do what I can to remove you from this profession.”
Wright asked Hook to give up his law license. “I will not do that,” Hook replied.
“Shut up,” Wright replied. “I want you to resign from this profession.”
Cook has wisely hired outside counsel.
May we suggest a Christmas gift for him: a bowl of dicks.
![Lawyer who sent 'eat a bowl of dicks' emails to opposing counsel incurs judge's wrath](https://i0.wp.com/mikesouth.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/YRRnCNz.jpg?resize=800%2C530&ssl=1)
2 Responses
LOL @ “Michael Avenatti with Tourette’s”
I like that attorney. I learned a couple of new ones here. His behavior was unprofessional but I don’t think he should lose his bar card over it.
Using my newfound insults, I think “Mr. Snotty Dick” Louie Smalls should go eat a big bowl full of dicks. Maybe a 50 man gangbang would be appropriate for him.