I gotta call from a buddy of mine last week. Said he was gonna be in L.A. and didn’t know a soul there, he wanted me to come out and have some fun. From anyone else I’d be suspicious that all he wanted was to meet porn chicks, not this guy though.
Where ever he goes, girls throw themselves at him, seriously. He has recently been a model for Karl Lagerfeld, a Playgirl Centerfold, been on billboards in Times Square, National Magazines, Catalogs, you name it. The fucker is hot, I know guys that readily admit it too, and if yer a guy…to look at another guy andd be able to say oh ya, that fucker is good looking….well he is.
So he wants me to hang out in L.A. with him, I told him I’d sooner get Ebola than to go to L.A. but I offered to hook him up with some cool people who’d show him some fun times.
So I call a friend in L.A. and she says sure, sounds like fun, he can hang with me and my girlfriend. So my friend has her girlfriend IM me, I see some pics, the girlfriend is tall, hot, brunette, hot, blue eyes, hot, did I mention she is hot? I chat with the girlfriend for a little while and she just flat out enamores me, I mean she is quick, hot, witty, hot, funny, hot, and she is a doll, so much so that I get a wild hair and invite her to join me in Mexico Beach next weekend, never really thinking she would accept. She does accept.
She is flying into Atlanta on a red eye Thurs night, I am going to pick her up at the airport and we will drive to Mexico Beach for the weekend for the annual gumbo festival there.
Now suddenly I realize I have a problem, just at that time Fifi Calls. Felicia knows the model guy, so does Tim Case. I tell Fifi the tale of impending doom. I mean this hot girl is going to spend the week hangin out with my buddy. If he were shallow and dumb It wouldn’t bother me as much but he isn’t. In addition to being good looking as all hell he is smart, articulate, intelligent and very funny. After a week almost of hanging with him this girl is going to come face to face with ME. I can’t imagine the disappointment she will be in for…I mean how am I going to make any kind of impression after that? Show her my LVNI branded sex toys with my photo on em? This fucker has pictures in a Karl Lagerfeld shot coffee table book….
Fifi listened intently. When I stopped there was a long pause. Then Fifi says…”You have a big weenie”
