RULE #1- Do not spit in my Face: A Personal Analysis of Sexual Boundaries

Sexual Boundaries are such a personal subject. There are no rules when it comes to determining your own boundaries. Whatever you choose should be respected at all times. In a perfect world, every partner would attempt to find out and then agree to follow any personal boundaries you may have involving your body and/or sexual preferences. Of course, we don’t live in a perfect world and this doesn’t always happen so it then becomes your responsibility to open your fucking mouth and tell them! It should also be mentioned that if you think you don’t have ANY personal boundaries, then you better take a closer look. Every single person on earth has their own personal boundaries whether you realize them or not.

With that said, I would make one pathetic porn star considering my top 3 sexual boundaries are:
1. No spitting in my face.
2. No slapping me in the face.
3. No ejaculating on my face.

As you may notice above, all of them somehow revolve around my face. I took way more than my fair share of psychology courses while in college, but I never did actually analyze my own sexual boundaries or exactly why I didn’t like certain sexual acts. As many people do, I just figured I didn’t like it and that was the end of it.

This particular analysis actually goes way back to when I was about 13 years old. It centers around one of the strongest boundaries I have: Don’t fuck with my brother. As I’ve mentioned before, I have a younger brother that I love to death. We get along great and I’ve always been somewhat protective of him. My father never spanked, hit or beat me. He was way more passive-aggressive emotionally abusive to me. He had a serious temper and it would generally come out with a vengeance and obviously scared the shit out of me when I was younger. He would routinely do things like get mad in the car and slam on the pedal to about 90mph. Needless to say, to a small child this is unbelievably scary.

Unlike me, my father did hit and beat my brother. He very rarely did it in front of me, though. I would generally get the bad news from my brother afterwards. The first time he laid a hand on my brother in front of me was after my parents got divorced and we were both eating dinner at his new house. All my brother did was spill a glass of milk. That’s it. Literally, just spilled milk. My father then flew into a rage and picked my brother up by the collar of his school shirt and slammed him into the wall while holding him up by his neck. I was scared and speechless at first, but then I got mad. Like really mad. I shot up, ran over to them and started screaming at my dad to put him down. Of course, he then yelled at me to stay out of it. The only thing I could think to do was run out of the house and hope he would follow me forcing him to run after me and leave my brother alone.

Well, it worked alright. I ran outside leaving the door wide open. He followed. I stopped once I made it to the sidewalk. He ran up behind me and didn’t touch me, but what he did do was put his face so close to my face that we were practically touching noses. He then proceeded to scream so fucking loud and aggressive at me that his spit was hitting me in the face while he yelled. It was unbelievably disgusting, but I knew better than to raise my hand and try to wipe it off or block the spit flying out of his mouth in a fit of rage. The only option I had was to stand there while staring him straight in the face. He, honestly, could have punched me in the face and it wouldn’t have hurt me as much as watching him hurt my brother. He screamed at me for a good 5 minutes straight about how I was never allowed to question him or his “parenting techniques.” I, cowardly, said nothing. There was nothing for me to say. All I wanted was for him to leave my brother alone and it worked. I had already accomplished my goal. I was so done at that point. Looking back, I’ve always found it interesting that I never once cried. I didn’t even shed a tear once he was finished. Taking numerous psychology courses in college would give me insight as to what my actions actually meant when it comes to being in “survival mode.”
As usual, once he finished screaming and spitting all over my face he then hugged me and told me he was sorry. So goes the typical story of almost all physical and/or emotional abusers. They’re ALWAYS sorry. They never understand why YOU made them mad? It never has anything to do with THEM. It is a constant cycle and “abusers” are, without a doubt, some of the world’s greatest experts at controlling others.

Personal boundaries originate for a whole variety of reasons. Some are purely surface-based such as “I just don’t like the way it makes me feel,” which is perfectly normal and may not have a deeper meaning other than you just simply don’t like something. But, some boundaries may very well come from deep within yourself and have more to do with your sub-conscience as well as past experiences. It’s obviously not necessary to assess any of them or may be hard sometimes, but analyzing the reasoning behind certain boundaries can be enlightening in some instances. The answers may surprise you.

I have to note this was actually harder to write then I thought it would be. I *might* have even cried just a little bit, but overall it was quite cathartic to write it out and actually kind of refreshing in some strange sort of way.
I think I’m going to go call my brother now and tell him how much I love him.

Xoxo, Lacey

55 Replies to “RULE #1- Do not spit in my Face: A Personal Analysis of Sexual Boundaries”

  1. laura

    Wow Lacey…that’s a very moving and intense story….I held my breath through out….thank God for survival mode and thank God for you….your bravery and strength touched me…..

  2. Lacey Blake

    @Walter Spohn –
    You are a fucking dork… hahaha. 🙂
    For the record: cum in my hair is totally acceptable, but only if you agree to wash it out afterwards.

  3. sachertorte

    @Lacey: facials are something that originated as a way to humiliate a woman. Definitely agree with you. If a woman actually enjoys kneeling porn-style, eyes closed, mouth open, ready to take the holy anointment, that’s her choice, but she should remember the origins of the practice. Even in gay porn, while there are of course still facials, you rarely see the bottom in the typical female porn star recipient posture.

  4. RiccoMarin

    Put your ass up in the air like you
    just don’t care. But I’m Yurizan
    Beltran and just don’t cum in
    my hair……

  5. rawalex

    If people need to be reminded not to spit in your face, perhaps you need to change the people you are standing around at the time.

  6. Lacey Blake

    Well, I wouldn’t be friends with people who wanted to spit in my face, therefore there would be no need for a “reminder”. If a stranger walked up to me and spit in my face, I would spit back and then beat the shit out of them.

    Face spitting in a sexual context is completely different for me as are a lot of other things done in the “bedroom.” I may have sex with someone who “gets off” spitting in other people’s faces during sex and that’s where the “Do not spit in my face” rule comes in.. There are some partners out there who LOVE having someone spit in their face during sex. I’m just not one of them. It’s all about respecting sexual boundaries between all parties involved.

    Sexual boundaries are generally much lower when it comes to sex due to the fact that some people like more “kinky” sex acts. When you add in fetishes, it just gets more complicated.

    On the street, it is a known rule that you do not walk up to someone and slap them across the ass. During sex, it’s one of those gray areas where there are numerous people who enjoy getting their ass slapped only during sex to increase sensations. (I am one of them.)

    Everyone has their own quirks when it comes to sex. What may be inappropriate on the street could be extremely hot in the “bedroom.”

  7. rawalex

    “I may have sex with someone who “gets off” spitting in other people’s faces during sex and that’s where the “Do not spit in my face” rule comes in.”

    I just don’t get it. It’s a nice long post to pretty much say you object to a sexual practice that probably less than 1% of the population even knows about, let alone indulges in.

    It says something, but not exactly what I think you wanted to say.

  8. richard373

    Rob Black : Asa Akira Is No Longer A Slob; Gets Her Dream Job At Wicked Pictures

    Making six figures and wearing condoms

    –Tom Byron

    “What happened today everybody? What was the big curveball you all got?”

    “That everybody’s dirty, filthy asian whore superstar Asa Akira is now a Wicked contract girl. And that, she said, is something that she’s wanted all of her life.”

    “So working for an all rubber company was something that she wanted all of her life. But the pitstop was doing the most heinous, dirtiest, filthiest things imaginable. Without a condom. And then she gets her dream job which she wanted all of her life with a company that mandates condoms.”

    “Hey girls! Did you all hear that?”

    “Asa Akira basically said hey all, fucking without rubbers and being a dirty fucking pig is like the minor leagues. I get to fuck with a rubber. I get to get a six figure contract. i get to have health insurance. What do you all get?”

    “You get Mark Spiegler! FUCK YOU!”

    “Wait a minute, girls. I thought if you wear a condom your pussy gets chafed and it gets all sore and now you’re gonna get infections. That’s why we can’t have rubbers.”

    “Nina Hartley. You’re 54 years old and I’m getting emails from LAX Models that you’re still ‘feisty’ and willing to do anal. At 54 years old. Hey Nina, guess what? Asa Akira is 27 and is getting six figures a year with a health care plan, dental plan, and she’s wearing condoms! What the fuck are you doing? you’re getting fucked in the ass bareback baby! WHOOOOO!!!”

    Rob sings the Good Times theme song:

    “Movin on up to the east side
    And Asa Akira’s going to the condom side
    We’re movin on up
    While I’m doing 10 man gangbangs
    And Asa Akira’s making six figures
    We’re movin on up
    Cuz Nina Hartley says girls that wear condoms are gonna get infections cuz their pussy are raw and chafed but Asa Akira doesn’t care cuz she’s gonna get a hundred thousand a year and never take a load in her asshole again. And Nine Hartley is getting pimped out by LAX Models at 54 years old because she’s still feisty!
    WHOOOOO!!!”

    “And girls! HEY LADIES! You just got FUCKED!”

    “So once again, can someone please tell me how condoms don’t sell when I guess Wicked Pictures can afford to sign a new contract girl? I guess that Elegant Angel deal didn’t work out.”

    “I have to give Mike South credit. He called it that Asa Akira was going to go with Wicked. I mean, it was two months ago, it’s a little late. I guess it took Patrick Collins to get out of the business, which I also told everybody was happening. Asa Akira and Tony Ribas were coming in to save the day, but I guess when the company was getting liquidated because of Pat’s divorce with Cindy Collins, Asa decided being a little anal cum dumpster for a gonzo company that was out of business wasn’t the way to go.”

    “And a condom company that doesn’t make any money and endangers the girls because they use condoms that chafe girl’s pussies and makes them raw and infected, I guess she was going to have to go there after all. And make six figures a year and a health plan and she has to use condoms.”

    “Hey LADIES! You know you’re all stupid right? There’s gotta be one more person out there besides Mackenzee Pierce that listens to me.”

    “You’re all out there carwashing for Diane Duke and Christian Mann and fighting condoms. You got your fellow girls out there getting HIV, hepatitis and syphilis. You’re all condemning your fellow women for contracting HIV and yell at her for doing the things that all of you do. You’re all told to carry the company line. No condoms and you’ll all be rewarded.”

    “And guess what? One of your own gets a hundred thousand dollar job with a condom company and she tells everybody that was her dream. And basically being a cum dumpster was the lowest point of her life and now she has her dream.”

    “Can you say dumb talent?”

    “Oh, and I forgot. I actually reach out to some of you and you guys direct me to you own little blogs where you wanna work with LATATA and have people sign contracts that you pinky swear that you don’t have HIV and you’ll rub dicks together.”

    “Asa Akira is making six figures a year wearing a rubber and what are you girls doing? You’re letting Jerry Estrada come inside of you. You’re sitting there working for Kink getting water tortured. You sitting there working for Adam Hasner and Dreamzone for like 800 bucks. You’re working with guys that are shooting there dicks up and spreading Hep C.”

    “I’m trying to figure out how an industry ignores a company that is all condom, all their employees have healthcare, six figures, etc. And there’s still going strong. Now they just signed Asa Akira and she’s now not gonna have to do anal creampies anymore. She’s now not gonna be doing “load dumping.” Asa Akira is now gonna be in real movies acting. She’s gonna have a medical plan. She’s gonna be able to afford all of her testing because she’s gonna be pulling in at least $2500 a week.”

    “Can any you talent out there from Charity Bangs to Gracie Glam to Andy San Dimas to Kimberly Kane to Chanel Preston can all of you guys tell me where you went wrong?”

    “The job the girl wanted and dreamed about was working for an all condom company. That was her dream and i guess that’s what she got. And what’s she’s been doing with you guys is basically called slumming it with the fucking dregs. Because now she gets to wear a condom. Now she gets to be safe. Now she gets to actually pick her talent. Now she gets to call the shots because she’s a woman. She’s got the pussy and she controls the business.”

    “Girls, whatever girls are listening, You realize you just got bitch punked? All of you sexy little Heidi Hollywoods and the other ones that load dump, DP, do it all baby. Shit, Katie Summers has a friend that’s been slugging it out in this business for 8 years. 8 years and this girl still lives in a model house when she comes out here. This girl is like 30 years old and will do whatever is necessary to increase her standing and she cries herself to sleep at Chris at Foxxx Modeling’s house because she lost an award to a nobody with a big red bush. And she cries herself to sleep because she takes load after load and you have somebody like Asa Akira, who’s not a big tit blonde that looks like a fashion model who takes 17 loads in her mouth. She’s an asian who uses a condom now. And she’s got a hundred thousand dollar contract and you have girls that are willing to blow a homeless guy and they live at a model house and they’ve been doing this for ten years and they got NOTHING!”

    “If this ain’t an indictment on every one of you stupid motherfuckers. It’s comical. Everyone of you girls that are with your little pimps, their little bitches and go ‘Derek Hay’s got a plan for me’ What’s your fuckin plan? To be a fuckin animal? Is that Derek Hay’s plan? For you to be a fucking farm animal?”

    “If you’re the biggest star in the world and you’re Asa Akira and your pimp Mark Spiegler wants to have nothing but the best for you and you make hundreds of thousands of dollars on the open market letting guy after guy fill up you holes with cum, and of course that big deal with the huge successful Elegant Angel, then riddle me this “Spiegsy.” Why would that girl take herself off the market, pull herself away from “Spiegsy” and plump herself down with a company that controls every facet of life for a contract girl?”

    “Riddle me this, if being a Spiegler Girl is so awesome and being an LA Direct girl is such a great thing, and you’re running around doing privates and getting the shit beat out of you by Princess Donna like Skin Diamond does, why would you give up all that success to go with an all condom company that by industry standards nobody watches, nobody cares, doesn’t sell, makes no money and is irrelevant?”

    “So all of you ignorant, stupid talent, or at least that what mommy and daddy said you were, can you at least wise the fuck up tonight? When you have a great agent like Mark Spiegler, the agent “Spiegs” who had a girl named Asa Akira, just like he had a girl named Sasha Grey, and he had them doing god knows what, and I guess that path was so special and so earth shatteringly awesome that the minute these girls could leave, they do.”

    “Of course, Sasha Grey got scooped up by Steven Soderbergh, so that explains that. But it is interesting that Sasha Grey has never once talked nice about that troll Spiegler. Not even mentioning the guy who got her her big break, the great manager.”

    “And now we’ve got Asa Akira. Asa Akira, who is even funnier. Remember this is a girl who did nothing when she started in this business. She didn’t do cum dumping, cum swallowing, nothing. She goes to Mark Spiegler, and of course Mark Spiegler’s rules are let me turn you out and make you the biggest pile of shit in the world. But that path is so successful. And here you have Asa Akira and she gets signed by Elegant Angel, a gonzo company who does the hard gonzo, ten man gangbang, load in your face, choke you out Mason directed, beat you to death like Princess Donna epics. But nobody told them that Patrick Collins was going to change his mind because Cindy Collins wants her millions, so now Asa Akira and Tony Ribas look like retards.”

    “So then Asa goes to Wicked and says what can we do? Because there is no way I’m going back to Spiegler so I can have another load times fifty dumped down my fucking throat. And I’m lucky I never got the spyh, cuz who knows how many girls here caught it? And we’ll never know because all the girls who were caught in the Mr. Marcus syphilis scandal vanished or started only doing girls. I sat in a restaurant with Andy San Dimas watching her put her head on his gristled fat chest and call him ‘Daddy’ Spiegs. And then Andy goes to LA Direct right around syphilis time. Wonder if San Dimas got one of these doctor notes? We’ll never know because ‘Spiegs’ will never say anything.”

    “So all you 101 Modeling talent, all of you OC talent, keep opening your little assholes, because nobody buys condom porn. Nobody buys Wicked Pictures porn. Brad Armstrong and the crew over there all make six figures and he and Jessica Drake tweet pictures of them eating at million dollar restaurants. And guess what? They wear condoms!”

    “Jessica Drake makes six figures, she’s probably fucked four guys her entire career and you girls out there get fucked up your shitpipe, doing privates in motel rooms, all for the love of Derek Hay and Tee Reel and all these guys who tell you to bend over, open up and take it like a little cunt whore. Because that’s what sells.”

    “Take a look at the performer of the year. She does it all. You can fuck her in the mouth, ass, whatever you want.”

    “What, she’s a Wicked girl now? She said her dream was to be a Wicked girl?”

    “All you keyboard warriors, all you pimps and stupid whores, all you medical experts, all your rationalizations for not wearing condoms have now been thrown right out the fucking window.”

    “All of you say condoms are bad, consumers don’t want to see them, it we use them it will be the death of the business and now the great agent Derek Hay is saying you all have to pay an extra 20% across the board, because you can’t pass the expense on to the consumer, because the consumer won’t buy condomless porn even though all the condomless companies are going out of business and the company that is all condom just signed a girl that worked without condoms before and she’s making more money than all of you do who work for Jim Camp for $700 doing seven man gangbangs without condoms and doing escort gigs in motel rooms.”

    “You’re all a bunch of fucking slobs that are slaves to a system that risks your lives and health for peanuts.”

    “Keep fighting those condoms!”

    “Asa Akira is now making six figures a year wearing one and has healthcare. Any of you who don’t wear condoms are slobs.”

    “Asa Akira is a very nice woman. You know why? Because she now works for a condom company.”

    “She left being a slob.”

  9. BrookeTyler

    Rarely happens. Typically only well adjusted individuals with a solid family background fill out the application for facialabuse.com I could be wrong, but I don’t think the author is a “porn girl”.

  10. mharris127

    I think Oprah already has Stedman (the guy she has been fucking since 1986) to fuck her up the ass. I guess you could call Harpo Productions and let them know that you would like to be on call for ass fucking duty in case Stedman breaks up with her or breaks his dick (ala Prince Yahsua). 🙂

  11. rawalex

    “You must not be too familiar with BDSM porn, I suppose?”

    Your kidding, right? I know well enough, thanks (I know where the dungeons are hiding in my home town). But I also know that while many of them are into kinky things, very few are interested in spitting in each others faces. Face spitting is a very low percentage sexual thrill, there are probably way more people with a balloon fetish!

    I guess if you sexual partners are in the small minority that gets off on this, then you might need to hang a sign. Then again, you may want to have a “Don’t stick a tennis racket in my ass” sign too, because it’s just about as likely to happen.

  12. Lacey Blake

    So, you’re telling me caning is perfectly ok, but spitting on someone is crossing a line?

    Dude, people are into some crazy sex shit. I just try to keep an open mind about it and figure out what my OWN boundaries are…

    There is a whole sub-section of people who like to eat shit during sex. Certain people are in to water boarding. Others like having their balls punched. I don’t fucking know why this gets them off, but they don’t really surprise me at all. Maybe it’s all of the psychology courses I took?

    The desire to spit in someone’s face during sex is not that abnormal. Shit, the desire to ejaculate on someone’s face during sex is actually pretty fucking common these days.

  13. mharris127

    Actually that is very possible. However my joke wouldn’t have worked as well if I had said that.

    For the rest of us, a woman’s beard is the man that she keeps around for show so that we don’t find her real lover, an ugly manly woman like the ones Jodie Foster or Diane Duke sleep with. Something about these women being embarrassed to be lesbian.

  14. Lacey Blake

    @mharris127 –
    Beard – (According to the Urban Dictionary)
    A women who goes on a date with a gay man to mask the fact that he is gay.
    So, I guess you just switch around the terms woman and man, accordingly.

    (I swear I actually went and looked it up because I had never heard of a “beard?”)

    There are a few people I suspect of being a beard… even some in the porn industry. Who really knows???? 😉

  15. PeterP

    Mike,

    Why on earth do you have a boring MFC camgirl writing about her daddy issues on your blog?

    I’ve spent over $15k at MFC this year and not a single token on her. Why is her opinion so relevant? Has she ever even worked in the adult industry aside from being a cam model?

    She just recently got rocks for tits so i’m going to have to assume she’s a newb.

    Not a good look. Especially when people talk about you being pussy whipped.

    Also Cumming on a girl’s face has very little to do with humiliating the girl. What a ignorant and fucking stupid comment from some of the loudest people on this blog.

    Obviously some guys are into the humiliation aspect but that’s the minority of men.

    Really stupid. This girl doesn’t want a guy cumming on her face WHO THE FUCK CARES?!? loooool This is such a self serving article post. I repeat DOES SHE EVEN DO PORN?! SHES A SOLO CAM GIRL!! AAAAAAAAArrrghhh

  16. rawalex

    See Lacey, this is why it’s hard to take you seriously. I didn’t mention caning, you took it there. Kinky is a whole lot of things, why did you pull that one out? Personal preference, perhaps?

    Thing is, as a sexual thrill, spitting in the face is pretty low on the list, and generally seems to be a fantasy of guys (or guys) who like to humiliate and to some extent simulate rape or unwanted physical action. I don’t consider any of that to be very sexy at all. In 15 years in the business, I have never come across anyone who actively promotes that for a living. It may happen as part of certainly play, but you have to be in some pretty rough and arrogant company for it even to be an issue.

    My point in the end I guess is that if you need to tell people not to spit in your face during “sex”, then you perhaps need to change partners.

  17. MikeSouth

    Lacey writes because she is intelligent, well spoken, funny and she can write. You havent spent any money on her on can shows because she doesnt do cam shows at least not to my knowledge. She is something of a fan and is certainly an open minded consumer who is a customer of the industry. That makes her ideas and opinions very valuable to people who ARE in the industry. They would be very wise to listen to her since she is exactly the demographic that many of these companies are depending on these days.

    Lacey is also a CPA and her advice on Obamacare was valuable to anyone in the biz who needed to know about it…i got a LOT of great feedback on that one.

  18. Lacey Blake

    @PeterP –
    You must be referring to someone else??

    I am not a cam girl nor have I ever been.
    I am not in the porn industry.
    I am not an escort.
    I am not a stripper.
    I do not have boob implants.

    So, who in the fuck are you actually talking about here? It sure as fuck isn’t me……

    Also, why does my opinion matter?
    Ask Mike. It’s his fucking blog…

  19. jilted

    @PeterP,
    Spending 15k a year on your porn habit does not make you part of the porn industry either. Actually it just makes you pathetic.

    And why does your opinion matter Pete? Dont bother answering, its a rhetorical question, your opinion doesnt matter.

  20. laura

    “Also Cumming on a girl’s face has very little to do with humiliating the girl. What a ignorant and fucking stupid comment from some of the loudest people on this blog.Obviously some guys are into the humiliation aspect but that’s the minority of men.”
    I gotta tell you PeterP, the majority of women do think humiliation plays a large part…..that’s not stupid or ignorant to think that from our point of view….now if you would like to enlighten us on what you thinks really going on from a mans perspective that’d be a lot more interesting then you just slamming someone’s opinions and thoughts…..I find your lack of sensitivity you show to others offensive and sad….

  21. jilted

    @laura,
    Asking for a ‘mans perspective’ from someone who admits to spending 15k a year on cam girl porn is pretty funny.

  22. Dantes

    So, basically, Lacey Blake doesn’t like being spit on because her father abused her and she feels no responsibility to get over it.

    I’m not saying that her aversion to being spit on isn’t reasonable, but “I developed negative feelings about it as a child” isn’t a reason.

    This is merely the promotion of unabashed emotionalism* masquerading as sincere psychological introspection and self-improvement.

    *Many people today believe you must simply “trust your heart.” This means that you should basically follow your emotions blindly; if you deeply and sincerely feel something is true or good, this it is true or good for you. In other words, a person’s feelings are the only evidence he requires to determine if a claim is true or false, right or wrong. This means, for example, that if I believe in astrology, numerology, tarot card reading, or alien landings, the such beliefs are true for me. Similarly, if I feel that drug use, indiscriminate sex, or even violence is right, then such actions are right for me.

  23. Lacey Blake

    @Dantes –
    Holy fucking shit… I actually read your post like 3 times just to make sure I was reading it correctly?

    Let’s clear one fucking thing up: I don’t like people spitting in my face because it’s fucking disgusting and I don’t particularly like spit. As far as sexual boundaries go, I don’t need ONE fucking reason why I don’t like something…
    That is why this blog is called an “analysis.” It involves psychologically looking below the surface to “analyze” whether a boundary may be associated with something from your past. It is not an excuse for why you don’t like something… it’s attempting to better understand a psychological reaction.

    And, I fucking LOVE this bullshit:
    “So, basically, Lacey Blake doesn’t like being spit on because her father abused her and she feels no responsibility to get over it”

    Oh, let’s play with the above genius fucking statement for the fun of it:

    “So, basically, Lacey Blake doesn’t like being raped because her father raped her and she feels no responsibility to get over it.”

    “So, basically, Lacey Blake doesn’t like getting punched in the face because her father punched her in the face and she feels no responsibility to get over it.”

    “So, basically, Lacey Blake doesn’t like being tied up during sex because her father continuously tied her up when she was bad to punish her and she now feels no responsibility to get over it.”

    Grow the fuck up and go take a few god damn psychology courses, asshole.

  24. Lacey Blake

    I have to admit, I never considered how a purely psychologically analytical blog post would be that hard to fucking understand? I guess I should keep that in mind for future posts… maybe I should just write about the different colors in a crayon box or the correct procedure for opening an umbrella? Maybe that would be simple enough for you to understand?

  25. mharris127

    Good retort Lacey! Dantes needs to quit checking his brain with his coat at the door. Also, Mike South said to tell Dantes to get his brain out of the Institute coat room before it starts to decompose and stink. 🙂

    BTW very few people outside of porn like to be spat upon. In fact, most in porn don’t either but for $1000 some women will allow more leeway into what is done to her for a scene. People have the right to carry their own sexual boundaries, in my case (being a man) I only fuck women and do not allow anything to be shoved up or placed near my ass. However, if Marci Hirsch pays me $1 million a year to direct movies for Vivid I might let her lick my asshole as Nick East has said she likes to do (Marci, if Nick is lying about you I apologize — I needed an example to use here). I might even make sure it doesn’t have any shit on it before doing so. However, that is my decision and only my decision to make. Lacey has the same rights I do in regard to sexual boundaries.

    Lacey, if you ever meet Dantes in person I suggest a lockable chastity belt to keep him out of your pants (trust me, you don’t want to have him there with the disrespectful comment he made here) and a welding shield over your face so he can’t spit in your face.

  26. Dantes

    I shouldn’t even reply, because juding from your obscenity-laced reaction and your failure to do so, you’re not an honest opponent who will calmly, fairly, honestly evaluate my claims, but since other people read this I guess I will.

    Looking into one’s past to discover the source of one’s emotions about a particular thing is not analysis. It’s discovery. It’s not analysis to say “ah hah! I don’t like this because of this thing from my past.” OF COURSE it’s something in your past. Where else would it come from? A bolt of lightning? Cupid’s arrow? Heck, even if someone has a particular sort of brain deficiency that makes them react one way – instead of the “normal way” – it’s still something in their past that triggered it (ie: caused them to come have a recurring emotion about a particular thing). Discovering what that thing is is helpful, but it doesn’t answer WHY one’s reaction is what it is. Maybe it’s the brain deficiency, maybe it’s an unidentified and long-forgotten conclusion (correct or incorrect), but it is SOMETHING. A person’s father spitting in her face doesn’t AUTOMATICALLY make someone dislike being spit in the face. Unless being spat upon in the face is intrinsically “disgusting” (which it’s not, or else NO ONE would like it), you’re going to have to dig a little deeper than “my dad unintentionally did it to me when he was emotionally abusing me” to know why you don’t like it.

    You’re going to have to understand what’s “fucking disgusting” about being spit on in the face to be able to responsibly say that it is. …just as you’d have to do in order to say the same thing about rape, or face punching, or being tied up as a child by one’s parents. It can be done (because, I agree, those things are disgusting, and your childhood conclusion about one of them was the right one, even though you don’t remember what that conclusion was), but to just say “they’re just bad, prima facia”, or “most people wouldn’t like those things” isn’t it.

  27. Lacey Blake

    @Dantes –
    As someone who actually has a degree in psychology, your posts even confuse me. What the fuck are you even trying to say?

    You generally need to “analyze” something before you can “discover” anything…
    Or, you need to “think” about something before you can come up with a “conclusion.”

    I can’t believe I’m even going to do this, but here you go:
    1. Spitting – Germs/Humiliation aspects.
    2. Rape – Boundary violations/Pain.
    3. Face Punching – Pain/Humiliation.
    4. Tied up – Unable to move or protect myself. Trapped.

    As you will notice, most of these are kind of/sort of common fucking sense. Are those explanations good enough or should I try to dig deeper for you?

  28. BT

    It’s really hard to believe that anyone is trying to make the case that there must be something wrong with Lacey because one of her boundaries is that she doesn’t want to have someone spit in her face.

  29. Lacey Blake

    Dantes –
    I’m perfectly willing to debate you on this, but you’re going to have to speak up without using these ridiculous passive aggressive comments that don’t actually say anything useful….

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