A Day in the Life of a Pornographer
By Michael Payne
Murphy’s Law is an adage that is typically stated as: “Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time, in the worst possible way.”
I had a nearly perfect experience of Murphy’s Law when I booked a new girl for an anal scene. Looking back at that incident, it feels bizarrely funny, although not the kind of funny I wish on anybody.
I called this agency whose name I won’t mention to make arrangements for a shoot on Friday. Everything was agreed upon and confirmed, until I got a phone call from the agent on late Thursday evening. He was trying to explain that the girl just did an anal scene this morning, the guy had a big dick and fucked her up badly, she’s in severe pain and we would have to post pond the Friday shoot. I told him that’s fine, so when can we shoot the scene? He said she’ll be good by Sunday, I guarantee that. We agreed. The call time on Sunday was 1 PM. Around noon, the agent called me back to say the girl is not coming, she’s still in pain. I told him that everything is set, my camera man is on his way, and I have to pay hundreds of dollars in kill fees if the shoot gets cancelled. “You told me you will guarantee my shoot, you have to keep your word and work things out, it’s your responsibility.” He said he will find a replacement for his flaking model.
The camera man came on time and set everything up. The agent called at 2 PM and put me on a three way conference with the replacement girl. We talked and agreed on the shoot, rate, etc. She said she’ll be there around 4 PM. By the time she arrived it was 6 PM, and boy did she arrive. She was a complete, utter mess, drunken and wasted to the extent that I wondered how she drove and got to the set without wrecking her car. She then went for her enema, half an hour later she walked out of bathroom and said she’s been at a party last night where she had too much food and drink. “I’m sorry honey.” She said. “But we can’t do anal, unless you want me to shit all over your dick.” At that point I just wanted to get over with this nightmarish shoot and cut my misery, so I said all right, we’ll skip the anal part. “Thank you.” She whispered, then crashed on the couch, spread her legs and said: “Come fuck me, let’s wrap this shit up so I can go get some sleep.” It was one of the most disgusting moments I’ve ever experienced on a set, I realized I won’t be able to fuck this drunken sailor with a stolen dick. I asked her to get dressed and leave. She didn’t say anything, nobody said anything. She packed her stuff and left. I paid the camera man $250 in kill fee and apologized for wasting his time on a Sunday, no less.
That night, I took a long bath to get the dirt of a shoot from hell off of me.
24 Responses
So, let’s start by saying I found this an interesting read. It’s that behind the curtain stuff, where you see the industry without the makeup, good lighting and fantasy backgrounds.
At the same time, it illustrates the distasteful side of the industry. Let’s get real: Anal is a delicate act under the best of circumstances; there’s always the risk of bleeding, injury and, well, a mess. Porno anal is a violent act – and I enjoy anal, so that’s not a criticism. But, rectums weren’t designed to be pounded in the same way as a vagina. So, girl A gets pounded and says, my ass can’t take another pounding right now. And, she is described as “flaking.”
@BT
Now that’s you ask. Whiteacre loves to get his rectum pounded every and anyway he can.
At the end of the day, this is a business. Yes, it is a business which involves personal sexual acts….but a business none the less. A good agent, many times, is going to have the foresight not to book a girl 2 days in a row for anal, if its a girl thats known to be more delicate or not have a ton of experience. I’ll give the agent a pass on that here, as perhaps this is a girl who typically is fine to do this kind of thing, or perhaps insisted that she would be ok to do it. The first reschedule sounds reasonable. To call up an hour before the shoot on the reschedule date to tell the director she still can’t do it is unprofessional. Now I don’t know if it was the agent that waited that long, or if it was the girl who all of a sudden sprung this on the agent. From my experience, I would bet the girl called up an hour before the shoot and told her agent that all of a sudden she couldnt do it. Its not “mean” to describe her as a flake at that point. She knew her ass was still hurt saturday afternoon right? She knew it was still her saturday night right? She knew it was still hurt sunday morning right? The professional thing to do, would be to call the director on saturday, or at the very latest first thing sunday morning and let him know that the shoot still couldn’t happen. If you’re waiting until 1 hour before call time, you lose all my sympathy. At that point, you’re deliberately causing harm to the producer. There are some agencies that would have the girl pay the director a production damage fee (or “kill fee”) at that point, to at least provide some compensation to him, and it would be rightly deserved.
Theres this odd pervasive notion in this business that all female models in it are victims somehow and because of that, they should be able to get away with acting unprofessionally, and there should be no consequences to them for it because of this “these poor girls” mentality. The funny thing here is, that kind of thinking is actually insulting to the business, and to the models that are in it. When a model waits until 1 hour before a shoot to cancel, yes..she is a flake…she is hurting people….she is taking jobs away from people…and its unnecessary. If she needs to cancel the shoot because of an injury, thats reasonable. What is not reasonable is to do it in this manner.
In my opinion, the original model owes the producer a kill fee. The replacement model should have been sent home, and should owe the producer a kill fee as well. There has to be financial compensation for this kind of bullshit.
I hear you loud and clear Danny. That is great.
Keep up the good work Mr. South and have a
good Monday.
Shalom
Danny, that may be true (I really don’t know) but I doubt Michael Payne wants to fuck another man for his scene. The whole point of a boy-girl scene is for the boy to fuck a girl. Whiteacre doesn’t qualify as a girl no matter what his sexual desires are.
Mr. Mouse, I agree that a kill fee is due but I think the agent should pay it and if he decides to try to get it out of the performers then that is his perogative. Payne was more accomodating than I would have been, I would have sent the drunk idiot of a performer home (in a taxi, I would not have allowed her to drive off of my set in that condition) the minute I smelled the booze on her. It is actually very dicey attempting to use a performer in that condition, the model release might not hold up in court and she could say even say she was raped or coerced into doing the scene due to being impaired from the alcohol.
Hey Michael, this is such a good story..lol and a great reminder.. that in an industry with Anal as a category, you’re bound to run into a few assholes. 😀
I can’t agree with you more BT….this story left such a bad taste in my mouth… I had to take a shower after reading it!….boohoo Mr. pornographer…. your life is sooo tough…. damn those flakey girls…
Got to say Mike, good article and funny too.
Ya it is well written and sadly I hear this all to often these days in porn. Thing is people wonder why agents got to be the norm in this biz…well there ya have it. Say what you want about Derek, Speigler and others but Derek made his chops by guaranteeing the girl you book will be on set, on time, clean sober and ready to shoot, For most directors, specially the higher end ones it was worth the extra bucks. So next time you wonder why people generally dont book direct…re read this.
Do note that I did not write this I usually dont deal with agents because there werent any here there is one now and he is a decent enough guy so after a lot of selling me on his part I do use his girls now.
Im happy to add Michael Payne as a writer here y’all give him a big welcome
I understand that porn is a business.
At the same time, it was the agent – not the girl in pain – who made the promise to the director that his gal would be ready to go on Sunday come hell or high water, ready for an anal pounding. How could she possibly know then she was going to be healed and ready by Sunday?
If the actress is injured, in pain, or fears further injury, do you expect her to just buck up and put her health at risk for a few hundred bucks because her agent made a promise? If so, will the director – or agent – pay her medical bill if she really is injured and not just “delicate?” What I read continually on these sites is: Hey, she knows what she’s getting into; she signed a release; it’s not our problem if she’s hurt, injured, or acquires a disease. So ….. we have two standards for actresses: If they’re injured performing, that’s their problem. They signed the release. If they say they’re injured and can’t perform without risking further injury, they’re flakes.
If there’s a kill fee owed, its owed by the agent who made the guarantee. How he wants to handle it with his talent is up to him, but the agent and not the talent made the promise.
You’re assuming things here and missing the point. You’re assuming it was the agent who pushed the girl to say she would be ready by sunday. It could very well have been the girl who insisted “i’ll be ready by sunday, reschedule it for sunday”. Even if that WASNT the case, the girl should have canceled the rescheduled shoot on saturday or at the very latest sunday morning. I can almost guarantee that it wasn’t the agent’s decision to wait until an hour before call time. I say this because I’ve seen girls do things like that countless times. Again, its this “oh these poor girls” attitude here. There was likely some irresponsibility on the model’s part by not canceling the rescheduled shoot earlier. No one is saying that the girl should re-injure herself, or do the shoot anyway. The issue is the manner in which she canceled, not that she canceled. The responsible thing would have been, on saturday night, to call her agent and say “listen i’m sorry for the trouble but i’m still not feeling up to the scene and I think its better to cancel now then possibly have to cancel on the day of the shoot”…..very easy and everyone would understand that
Hey Michael Payne. Welcome to the best porn blog in the Industry and
hope to hear more great stories from you great productions you have done. Hopefully your stuff better than that loony bird in North Hollywood that sounds like he’s on meth.
Welcome Michael Payne.
Thank you Mike and thank you readers and friends, mikesouth.com is truly the best blog in the adult industry, and I’ll be glad to contribute to it. More stories are coming up, and if you thought this day in the life of a pornographer was bizarre, then wait until you read the next chapters. Cheers.
Welcome Michael from me as well. I look forward to seeing your future articles for this blog.
Hey Michael,
Welcome. I, for one, LOVE reading on-set horror stories whether it’s mainstream or porn. It happens pretty much everywhere these days.
Keep them coming!!!
Lacey 🙂
Welcome Michael Payne. We hope to see more good stuff and better than Rob Blacks shit over there at that crappy site of his. He sucks.
@MichaelPayne
Welcome & Ty for the insight!
Gotta know…did you charge the Agent for the 250 camera man fee? Sucks even more if it was same guy who lost out on Friday then postponed planned income & got less than what he planned all together after wasting one definite day and probably another unless he lucked into a last minute gig.
Geez Louise you guys… I’m I the only one that finds this article narcissistic and distasteful?…..It’s dripping with no Empathy!… a kind person would have a back up performer scheduled just in case the first person though she could make it but really couldn’t or just scheduled another person from the get go incase person one wasn’t feeling better so soon…. it’s an assumption that it was the girl that canceled so last minute …even so it was the agent that promised and should be held responsible…. this story was terrible…. what a life… too hard core for me to even read….. thanks BT for being the voice of reason and reminding me that there are some decent kind guys out there that enjoy porn.
@LurkingReader,
I didn’t charge the agent for kill fee, but in return, he gave me credit and did not charge me an agency fee for the next two bookings. As for the camera man, unfortunately he was the same guy who lost on Friday, but the agent notified me of Friday cancellation 24 hours in advance and I was able to notify the camera man. Shooting porn is an unpredictable business, but as long as people have the courtesy to notify each other at least 24 hours in advance of any changes in schedule, cancellations, etc. it’ll be fine.
@MP
Ty for clarifying how it got worked out. With a food & special event back ground, also unpredictable but with 72hr cancellation policies it’s a bit easier to plan & run business.
@Laura
Not seeing the narcissism in original article.
“It’s dripping with no Empathy!… a kind person would have a back up performer scheduled just in case the first person though she could make it but really couldn’t or just scheduled another person from the get go incase person one wasn’t feeling better so soon”
By using an agent he was doing just that, then accepting the alternate the article makes the point that it started with “Murphy’s Law.” Can see where some of the comments come across as a bit narcissist with excuses and justifications they might allow given the situation and 20/20 hindsight.
Mr. Payne,
Thank you for the well written, informative article. And thank you for pointing out two of the illegal activities that have existed in the porn indudstry for a long time, the kill fee, and the agencey fee.
The agents are supposed to get paid a percentage of the performers income, the ‘agency fee’ charged to producers is illegal, most everyone knows it, but they play along anyway because its porn, and no one follows the rules in this ‘self regulated’ industry.
The ‘kill fee’ is something quite different. The kill fee was originally a way to force a performer to perform. It was used as leverage against girls who might have second thoughts,,,,”Either you do the scene or you will owe us money(killfee)” Eventually, after seeing how this tactic as very successful, it was adopted by the majority of the industry as ‘business as usual’ and now the kill fee is an accepted part of the industry, as illegal as it is. ONLY IN PORN
@Jilted,
The adult industry, if we can even call it an industry, is a bizarro world, it’s the Wild West on steroid, that’s why it has invented and adopted rules and regulations that do not apply to any other industry and any other walk of life, and that’s why it’s in a state of chaos and confusion today. The chickens have come home to roost.