I’ve been reading the “Real Men” series and I must agree with just about everything, so far. Where have all the John Waynes gone?? But being a woman, a REAL woman, there are a few things I’d like to share about us…..
1. REAL women drive whatever they want. If you want a ‘vette, suck his dick like there’s no tomorrow. If you want a Yugo, just lay there and sweat. If you want a Chrysler …… well, nevermind. Me? I just drive Hunter crazy. He drives ME around, while lusting over Volvo station wagons.
2. REAL women take lots of time to get ready. If you guys want us to look nice, smell nice, and be smooth and sexy, you won’t bitch about how long it takes. Just allot us plenty of time…….it’s called thinking ahead. (Hunter takes twice as long to get ready as I do! He’s obsessed with his hair! I’m learning how NOT to bitch about it…LOL!)
3. REAL women hate Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart has done away with the true shopping experience. Why on earth would any woman want to go to ONE store, buy everything you might need for a week, then go home? The true shopping experience involves one or two girlfriends, DOZENS of stores, a L – O – N – G lunch with a few margaritas, and numerous trips to the car to un-bag, then on to another store to re-bag!
4. REAL women enjoy porn! Whether its watching, participating or producing it……we really do LOVE it! We have our favorites, just like you guys do…….gangbangs, bukkakes, boy/girl, girl/girl, softcore-more plot, etc. If a woman says she doesn’t like porn, then she hasn’t watched the right one. Hell, give me the internet and my favorite toy and I’ll show you a REAL happy REAL woman!
2 Responses
I don’t like the quality of this post. The author has to do a better job blurring the line between sincere personal expression and shameless promotion. If you’re going to capitalize on the porn-consuming public’s inability to seperate fantasy from reality by setting it further in stone through blogging, you can’t be so transparent. Otherwise, they’re going to sense something is going on and they might seek help to regain their sanity. Where would you be then?
See Kayden Kross’ posts for examples of how you can improve upon your deception.
How can I possibly be obsessed with my hair when it’s always PERFECT???
Mike, I swear you gave her this column just to fuck with me.