Sometimes Word Just Don’t Exist

The worlds smartest porn star, MENSA Member Asia Carrera

The photo you see here  is the chick who proclaimed herself to be a genius.  the smartest girl ever to do porn.  yes that’s Asia Carrera.

Yes that is a metal collander on her head.

Somtimes they write themselves…

If you want the full story behind that drivers license photo

GO HERE

112540cookie-checkSometimes Word Just Don’t Exist

Sometimes Word Just Don’t Exist

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57 Responses

  1. OMG! now I have seen it all! So Asia is claiming membership in the “satirical church of the flying spaghetti monster” and was allowed to exercise her religious rights by having her Utah drivers license photo taken wearing a colander on her head! WOW! this is unbelievable! Not only is she crazy but I can’t believe that Utah would allow her to do that. I guess this is what happens when you vote Obama in, eh? 😉 Thanks Obama!

  2. What’s amazing is that FSM folks like her say their Pastafarian ‘religion’ ‘requires’ them to wear a metal colander…..Seems a bit dogmatic and in direct opposition to the atheist ideal they promote.

  3. @commonsense

    “and was allowed to exercise her religious rights by having her Utah drivers license photo taken wearing a colander on her head! WOW! this is unbelievable! Not only is she crazy but I can’t believe that Utah would allow her to do that.”

    Which shows how little you understand the American Constitution and First Amendment. An AU man was forced to submit to a psychological exam to prove his fitness to drive during his three year fight to wear his metal colander for a license photo. Imagine the uproar and litigation that would ensue if any State tried to force an American to submit a psychological exam to prove their fitness to drive because they wanted to wear a colander on their head yet didn’t subject Muslims or Christians who wear identifiable religious garments to the same.

    Hopefully you’ll take comfort in the fact that even if they win their battle to change educational curricula..neither the Pastafarians nor the State can limit your right to believe as you choose.

  4. One thing for sure, a lot of people are reading
    this blog & article this morning.
    Maybe she’s promoting her new restraunt?

  5. Since when does Obama care about the constitution? He does what he wants regardless of the law.. Wait? am I talking about Obama or the people in the industry? 😉

    anyway, my point is that I am positive if he wanted to stop these crazy people from being allowed to wear a colander on their head in their drivers license photo he could. and as far as I know Muslim women aren’t allowed to wear their stylish burkas for their driver license photos. at least not the veil anyway.. I’m confused, doesn’t that go against their rights? but than again I thought the religion of peace didn’t allow women to drive?

  6. @commonsense

    “anyway, my point is that I am positive if he wanted to stop these crazy people from being allowed to wear a colander on their head in their drivers license photo he could.”

    I’m positive the day Obama or any other US president is allowed to prevent Pastafarians or anyone else from wearing items of their own choosing on their head (that do not obscure the facial image the license photo is intended to capture) is the same day Pastafarians will be allowed to force you to wear a colander on your head.

    “and as far as I know Muslim women aren’t allowed to wear their stylish burkas for their driver license photos. at least not the veil anyway.. ”

    That’s correct anything that obscures the facial image the ID photo is intended to capture is prohibited. You might notice Jessica is not wearing any facial cosmetics…this could be because she chooses not to wear cosmetics on a daily basis or advance planning to avoid the flack she expected.

    “I’m confused, doesn’t that go against their rights?”

    No a veil obscures the face to the point of defeating the purpose of facial identification the image is intended for.

    ” but than again I thought the religion of peace didn’t allow women to drive?”

    Anyone who meets the minimum standardized qualifications is free to seek a State issued drivers license or choose a similar looking State issued ID without driving privileges as they see fit. States take no position on whether or not a religion allows it’s adherents to drive or not.

  7. I get a good chuckle out of the “pastafarians”. If people want to make an ass of themselves to the DMV by posing for their ID picture wearing a metal collander than more power to them. Maybe I should wear a Bible strapped to my head at next renewal. Makes just as much sense as Asia Carrera wearing a metal collander, right? 🙂

  8. Who are we to deny the existence of The Flying Spaghetti Monster? Is the idea any more ridiculous than say, guardian angels???

  9. @Hunter

    Exactly….because I treasure my hope and belief in miracles you won’t catch me doubting the sincerity or intelligence of Pastafarians.

  10. @mharris

    No doesn’t make sense cause everyone at the renewal would think you’re nuts for wearing a Bible on your head vs reading what’s in it.

    The Pastafarians colander is a 2014 version of lapel pins and Logo Apparel that have long since blended into the scenery of our lives and no longer an effective advertising medium. Call them crazy if you want but this is one of the most clever PR efforts I’ve witnessed or expect to witness in my lifetime.

  11. “colander is a 2014 version of lapel pins and Logo Apparel”
    Let’s not forget the fish symbol on vehicles. When the plumber shows up and you see that fish on his truck, you can be sure he’s about to KNOW you (in the biblical sense).

  12. @hunter

    Lol…gold nugget pinky rings, Masonic Decals or hold on to your wallets pierced teenagers wearing black nail polish and boys who might be girls wearing makeup….I’m not sure any one individual represents the accepted stereotypes associated with the outward symbolism they choose.

  13. Slightly off topic but didn’t Asia have some kind of facial plastic surgery (seemingly to make herself look less Asian) after she left Vivid? Must have been at or around the same time she had her breasts done.

  14. Seems like everyone is doing the plastic surgery
    thing even Sean Tompkins over at TRPWL for the AVN 2015. He is so lady like, just like Whiteacre.

  15. To lack of common sense:
    What does the President have to do with the Utah DMV? I am tired of all the bigoted ant-Obama comments. Utah voted overwhelmingly for McCain in 2008, and Romney in 2012. A President has absolutely nothing to do with any DMV; Republicans do control Utah, which is reputed to have the largest patronage of on-line porn of any state, but then again, what does that have anything to do with license photos?

    The FSM is a satirical group that makes fun of organized religion, much as porn parodies poke fun at reality shows et al. In a free country, we should be free to wear any head covering we like. Common sense, I suggest a dunce cap for you! Of course unless you can cite how and why a President would take action on DMV photos, lol.

    I do recall that it was said Asia moved to Utah to be more low-key in her porn retirement. Mensan or not, colander hats are NOT low-key.

  16. @bfi: lol um, you do realize that the democrats got blown out in the last election, right? The republicans won in states where they haven’t won in over 100 years. Why? Because of that effing incompetent loser OBAMA! That was a big fuck you to him! By the way, I LOVE how liberals like you call anyone who doesn’t share their views a bigot. Lol since you like to throw those words around I will say that Obama is the biggest racist president we have EVER had! I suggest you put on that dunce cap because only a complete moron would still be supporting that halfwit wannabe dictator…
    Ps…. If Obama was a white republican not only wouldn’t you be defending him.. He would have been impeached already!

  17. @lurkingreader: My point is that if you cater to one crazy group than you eventually have to cater to the rest of the crazy people.. Let’s say a clan member wants to wear his hood and he calls that his religion. Or someone else wants to wear a Halloween mask and call that their religion…or a doctor wants to wear a surgeons mask and call that their religion… etc

  18. Oh and I know that the burka obscures their face but it is still their religious views, right? So you are going against their constitutional rights.. Because they are not allowed to show their face in public and you are forcing them too! 😉 lol I love your Obama response.. HOW VERY POLITICALLY CORRECT OF YOU! Lol I was being sarcastic! Except the part where I said he doesn’t care about the constitution regardless of the law he does what he wants. THAT’S THE TRUTH!

  19. Wait! I take that back. Your statement is no more ridiculous than anything mharris and lurking reader have said! Lol 😉

    One of these two can’t seem to tell the truth EVER! Psst.. Hint… He jerks off to women being tortured and raped…

    And the other is politically correct AKA full of shit and has an agenda… Psst I think you can figure out who I am referring to… Their is only one option left… Think hard. 😉

  20. “Call them crazy if you want but this is one of the most clever PR efforts I’ve witnessed or expect to witness in my lifetime.”

    LMFAO!!! Really? No one is even talking about this woman except on here and it was mentioned on a like 2 other porn sites.. No one else seems to really give a shit. lol no one is discussing it on any of the top news channels… Certainly wasn’t on my local news.
    Psst… Talking to Harris and saying crazy …. Well that’s … Bahahahahaha 😉

  21. @Common Nonsense
    You used lots of words, but failed to address bfi’s question at all. What the fuck does a POTUS (black, white, republican, democrat, spaghetti monster, or guardian angel) have to do with the Utah DMV. Now, I hate Obama as much as the next man, and probably a little more than most, but I simply can’t find the connection to “blame” him for this.

    I wonder… If a tree falls in the forest and Fox News isn’t there to cover it, is it still Obama’s fault?

  22. Omg! Hunter I WAS BEING SARCASTIC!
    So what I learned today? No one on here understands sarcasm! Haha
    Oh and hunter? Bfi is calling me a bigot because I don’t like Obama..when you resort to that… He loses the argument… He is also as politically correct as lurking reader.. And There are some questions that are sooo stupid they don’t deserve a response…

  23. Actually I carry a Michigan driver license so I would have to renew at my local Secretary of State office here (I am typing this from my Michigan home). Since the standard here requires a person to be a danger to self or others in order to be involuntarily committed I doubt I would have much to worry about.

    Also, I was being sarcastic suggesting that I would wear a Bible on my head in my driver license picture. It does make about as much sense as wearing a collander, though.

  24. so to sum up. I was being sarcastic about Obama and the dmv.. but NOT sarcastic about my views on Obama and how he does what he wants etc… and I am NOT being sarcastic about how stupid this law is to allow a woman to wear a colander on her head in her drivers license photo… but lurking reader brought up the constitution how it was her religious right to wear that thing on her head. so not only did that give me the opportunity to take another shot at Obama BUT THIS IS NOT EVEN A RELIGION! it’s just a goofy group of atheists trying to be smartasses! it’s not a REAL religion. but someone who belongs to an evil but nevertheless REAL religion .. like a Muslim woman …can’t wear their veil (and rightly so) but still that would go against her rights… so…

    anyway, apparently anyone can wear ANYTHING to the DMV and say it is part of their religion and as long as it doesn’t cover their face that is a ok with America… lol so go wear a pot on your head next time you have to renew your license and just say it is part of your religion.. hahaha

    this country has fallen so far… thanks Obama! (I can’t help myself I just had to take another shot at him) 😉

  25. @commonsense

    “My point is that if you cater to one crazy group than you eventually have to cater to the rest of the crazy people.. ”

    Yes…even you could have a drivers license if you meet the requirements and are willing to have your face imaged.

    A doctors mask like the veil obscures the face and would be disallowed for that reason. SCOTUS (Supreme Court of the US) rulings clarify this and might be the best source to end your hypothetical what ifs.

  26. @commonsense

    Driving is a privilege not a Right. If someone chooses to pursue that privilege they are responsible for meeting the requirements.

    Tyvm for pointing out the correctness of my policy observation. Seems you missed my disinterest in your ancillary opinions.

  27. @commonsense

    It seems you’ve confused MikeSouth.com comment forum as a an alternative to your obvious need for psychological feedback. Good Luck with that.

  28. @commonsense

    Careful….keep laughing like that and the men in white coats will come take you away.

  29. @mharris

    Your sarcastic analogy might make more sense if you wore a devil horns headband to a Bible thumper renewal. If they tried to have you committed you can claim your agenda was recognizing the devils temptation or that your a sinner in need of salvation. That might even appease @commonsense IF you promised to mend your aberrant ways and toe the line as she sees fit 😉

  30. @commonsense

    Reality check…over 224 primarily mainstream news articles plus countless blogs including MikeSouth have featured this event.

    So it seems the facts back my opinion that this a a clever PR effort vs your claim that no one gives a shit.

  31. I was an Asia fan when she was performing. A for Asia is still a very hot movie. I also found her relatively honest about her life – for example, she does tout the Mensa thing. She also owned up when she lost her shirt investing in tech stocks and has been brutally frank about struggles with alcohol and her weight – look at the photos on her Facebook page when she was 63 lbs heavier than she is today. So, hey, if she wants to wear a colander on her head and call herself a pastafarian, WTF.

  32. @commonsense

    To sum up….your comments about Obama are not sarcasm they absolutely reflect your intolerance for him as well as his policies.

    It’s clear you don’t see the value of allowing people to choose their headwear as they see fit and wouldn’t tolerate it if you were in charge.

    Blaming me for your actions works better if the truth isn’t there in black and white. You made the first comment …

    “exercise her religious rights by having her Utah drivers license photo taken wearing a colander on her head!”

    My response addressed relevant constitutional rights and ignored your obvious agenda to hijack another thread with your blatant anti-Obama sarcasm. So the truth is that I neither raised the issues nor gave you an opportunity to pursue your agenda.

    “BUT THIS IS NOT EVEN A RELIGION! it’s just a goofy group of atheists trying to be smartasses! it’s not a REAL religion.”

    Once again your comment reflects your ignorance and assumption that your ideal of what “religion” means matches the definition of “religion” for constitutional purposes.

    “but someone who belongs to an evil but nevertheless REAL religion .. like a Muslim woman …can’t wear their veil (and rightly so) but still that would go against her rights… so…”

    Clearly you have a problem separating truth from your opinion. True evil is intolerant folks like you presenting your opinion as fact to justify your bigotry discarding centuries of prevailing constitutional wisdom.

    “(I can’t help myself I just had to take another shot at him)”

    Perhaps a couple years of 3x a week hourly appointments with a psychologist will cure your inability to help yourself.

    Lastly….not sorry if you thought your summation would end it 😉

  33. So true, Lurk — at least at first glance. However, we are talking about religion here, the devil horns thing is done every Halloween by tens of thousands of children in the US and Canada already and none of them are Satanists. I haven’t ever seen someone go around with a Bible (or a collander) strapped to their noggin for Halloween.

  34. I am sorry to hear that Asia has struggled with alcohol abuse. Unfortunately a minority of us are genetically predisposed to alcoholism, I hope a cure is found soon but until then certain people with severe family histories of the disease need to take a hard look at themselves and ask if drinking is really worth the possible consequences (liver failure, jail, prison, stomach bleeding, certain cancers, brain damage). I don’t support a ban on alcoholic beverages (we tried that once and all it did was make both Al Capone and the Kennedys rich and criminals) but having all high school freshmen listen to a lecture from recovering severe alcoholics as to the real consequences of alcoholism might be reasonable, the Fifteen Minutes program required of all California public schools where they mock up a DUI car accident where one is “killed”, one “paralyzed”, at least one “wounded” and one “sent to get ass fucked nightly for at least 10 years at San Quentin” complete with a mock-up of an arrest, a night in jail and a trial/sentencing might work if it weren’t so focused on drunk driving instead of the consequences of drinking itself (the Fifteen Minutes program could lead someone to believe that if they don’t drive drunk there aren’t any consequences). Many of the larger CA school districts put their video from the Fifteen Minutes program on YouTube for public viewing if you are interested in knowing what the hell I am talking about.

    Sorry to get off on a rant here but I wish Asia the best and hope she can get her alcoholism under control — whether she chooses to wear a collander in public in the future or not.

  35. @mharris

    See your point on the PR aspect….how about wearing the devil horns on your sleeve to proudly proclaim your devilish ways as near and dear to your heart? If you position the headband right it might even show for a DMV picture. Wouldn’t even have to claim religious freedom cuz it might be a fashion statement 😉

  36. The colander on the head for a DL photo is a bit extreme for the sake of making a point, but obviously some still don’t get that point. Pastafarians and FSM is big parody on religion. The statement being made is that other “religions” are no more or less legitimate.
    Personally, I don’t believe there is a God, but I also don’t care for the label Atheist, as it has an anti-religion connotation for most that I don’t want to be labeled with. Therefore when I have to fill in that box on a form I list myself as Pastafarian.

  37. @Toby

    Ty…I know some who choose the Agnostic box vs Atheist box for the same reason. It’s sad how many people act like choosing not to sign up or get in line is tantamount to taking a stand against or neutrality waiting to be amended.

  38. Thanks Hunter, Toby and Lurk for trying to bring some common sense to the person known as common sense. Asia has earned the right as an American citizen to wear anything legal on her head! Let’s see if it was a statement or a publicity stunt. Due to privacy considerations, I do not think it was the DMV who leaked the info and pic to the media, so that leaves….

  39. If you look on Asia’s Facebook page, she did it as a goof. There are photos of her with her kids, and they’re all wearing colanders and cracking up. At the end of the day, is anyone harmed by Asia, or any other joker, wearing a colander on their head versus a turned around baseball cap or any other headgear? You can plainly see her features and identify the individual, so the state is not harmed.

    By the way, I believe in God, so I’m not promoting atheism agnosticism, or pastafarianism. At the same time, she’s an American. She’s got the right to wear what she wants, no matter how stupid some of us may think she looks, just like Green Bay Packer fans who wear cheese heads.

    The part that I think is funniest is that Asia is taken to task for choosing to wear something most of us think makes her look like a moron by an industry that argues it has the right not to wear something that most of us think would protect lives.

    Go figure.

  40. Lurking Reader? Do you think you could respond without critiquing my every word? That would be refreshing! You are trying way to hard! 😉

  41. Again lol! ( I can’t stop laughing) From me and the intelligent people who read your politically correct/drink the Kool aid cough cough BULLSHIT tripe! 😉 thanks for the laughs! Hahahahaha!!!!! 🙂

    That is what we could actually stomach enough to read! Lol

  42. @commonsense

    Sorry you didn’t appreciate having the opinions you spewed as fact challenged.

  43. @BT

    Can’t help grinning at your insightful take on the irony of folks who demand their potentially harmful choices be respected criticizing hers.

    Noticed her quote about her nine year old introducing her to Pastafarians but leaped to conclusion it was a statement. Glad she is using the opportunity to bond with her children regardless of her motives.

  44. Now that this thread has run its course I have some satrical questions. Are pastafarians allowed to eat spaghetti or is the eating of spaghetti not allowed as they would be eating their “god’s” noodly appendages? Also, are pastafarian men allowed to eat their wives’ or girlfriends’ clits out or are those also “noodly appendages”? Are pastafarian women allowed to give their husbands or boyfriends blow jobs or are those “noodly appendages” as well? 🙂 🙂 🙂 Have fun with this one, guys.

  45. Kinda hard to offend a ‘god’ you don’t believe in….I’m going with mystery meat tortellini and the phrase…buffalo butt is good eats 🙂

  46. Lurk, yummy idea! Meat-filled tortellini. Mix some ricotta-filled tortellini in the pasta, cook well, add meat sauce, mushrooms and cut green and red bell peppers. Delish! Especially yummy with a large iced down glass of Diet Coke!

  47. Damn Hunter did you have to go there and show the world how fucking stupid I am cuz I’m clueless to what if any degrees of Pastafarian there are? Even worse asked gaybor and he said it won’t matter if I drink more than two glasses of the French Bordeaux he gifted me with for the laugh he got reading fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

    Trying to decide which is worse …you telling the world how stupid I am or the bad influence that prances in the back door at odd moments looking for cream of tartar then bitching me out cuz it isn’t fresh enough for the meringue he wants to whip up….trust me unless you’re looking for TMI about his plans tonight it’s best not to ask what kind of pie he was topping. If the glint in his eye didn’t warn me off the not so subtle hints as he turned the glass wine aerator this way and that way saying about what a cute beginners toy it would be sure did 😉

  48. I think I have three guesses as to what kind of “pie” Mr. Reader wants to top tonight. Two of those guesses don’t count, the third one is one of two appendages of the human body (one on a male and the other on a female). Someone will be having a little egg merangue with his/her bodily appendage tonight, the other will be cumming all night long. 🙂

    BTW two glasses of wine won’t even affect a gnat. You will need to drink two or three bottles to get drunk enough to bother and that is for a beginner. Your husband meant well (assuming alcoholism doesn’t run deep in your family) but if he really wants to get you drunk he needs to buy another bottle. When I finally quit drinking wine wouldn’t affect me no matter how much I drank — I needed a fifth and a half plus of Crown Royal to get drunk and nearly a fifth just to get a buzz going (that was my favorite whiskey — yeah, at $20 a fifth or $47 a half gallon right before I quit drinking in 2006 I was probably spending $100 plus a week) to do that.

    Lurk, enjoy that night with Mr. Reader and post a full report on how much you want to tie him up and fuck him the same way he did you. 😉

  49. @mharris aka codgerlush 🙂

    Tonight’s plans belong to randy gaybor…Definitely sticking to my delusions of Nana’s deep dish lemon….and proudly own what a wimpy lightweight I am. I prefer relaxed vs shitfaced any time but especially during sex when I like to feel all the things I’ll never play kiss-n-tell with 😉

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